0335HRS

To be exact its 0340HRS now.

Still thinking what to write, but I feel like writting. My body is saying "..go to sleep ma fucker, im tired..." but my mind is saying "...write, express youself, you know you want to.."

This is why I hate blogging, because I can never quit writting.

Someone once said to me before that people who blogs have no life. I totally disagree! I mean rather then wasting money going out, might as well you sit at home in front of the computer and write (type basically; muahaha) Lately, I've been thinking alot about my career, my everything. I mean is this really what I want to do til I bersara. Do I still want to be who Im today? I honestly dont know. Well people are telling me to stay, dont quit. But is this what I want? What if I have a family later on in life? I dont think I could be so far away from them. i would like to have a 9-5. Weekends off. Family day. (gosh I'm actually thinking about all these things already..) I have to start thinking now rite? Or is that wrong?

I dont know where I'm going about this.

I'm a very complicated person eyy? People have told me that before. They say I complicate myself by thinking too much. But if I dont think, then its even worse kan? Then I wouldnt be using my brains? I mean I do use my brains, but you know what I mean. (you see how fucking complicated I am; cant even understand myself) Sometimes, I write with no base. Not with no base, but I just somehow or rather either go off the topic, or just dont know how to send the message out in a proper way; understandable.

0401HRS; confused.

Not confused about one thing tho, this particular has no base. Im just typing because my mind is telling my type. Probably my mind has something to say, but its not letting it out! (argh!! LET IT OUT!) Talking to Myrez, planning to have lunch tommorow. Hmmm dont think that's going to happen. It's a little hard to wake up before 1400HRS. I mean girl havent you heard of this man-created-thing called an alarm clock? (minta maaf myrez kerana bitching ttg awak..) OMG, she just told me that a gay-friend of mine is getting married! (apparently he is saying that he is bisexual; darling I know a gay when I see one.. I see gay! Muaaxx!) Trying to korek some secrets out. Not secrets but something I wasn't aware of basically. Sometimes, I could be slower then Umie for this matter. Well, we were at Frangi's the last friday. You know the group, and suddenly I saw the cunt Myrez snuggling up with a gay-friend-of-mine-whom-apparently-is-bisexual. I mean I did hear some stories about the both of them. (still shock about the marriage, and sorry for a being a bitch; this is the body typing not the mind.. LOL.) You see, I so agree with someone when they said, blogging is like writting something in your diary. I would get a diary, but it would be tiring to write, its easier to type. Faster some more.

0419HRS; realizing that im typing crap. LOL!

Im typing crap eyy? No base lansung, tadi bukan main lagi talking about career and all. Sik ku paham dirik aku sendirik. Someone said to me that everytime we argue I always dont have a base to argue about. Now let me correct that someone, is not that I dont have a base, I just dont want to say things that would jeopardise anything. I still do think before I say anything. (at times..) I can like type about so many topics at one thing kan? Its like killing 10 birds with 2 stones. LOL! (own version konon nya tek..)

Yawn. Sleepy. 0434HRS.

Well, he is already asleep. Put him to sleep just now. Sang lullabies, altho I cant really sing. Tap tap. Tuck him in to bed nicely. And best of all, moopiess. (something only me and him would understand. NOT SEX btw. Just incase salah anggap.) Oh he bought a new quilt cover. I like! Its really nice. Apparently it was on sale at IKEA. Stripy and all. And finally now we are using the QUEEN SIZE QUILT. Imagine, we used to share this small little blanket before at Tmn Desa, then to a single quilt at Pelangi and now to a Queen quilt. Funny kan?